Monday, January 23, 2012

Santorum Loves CUM

Given the number of emails I've received about this, I'm pretty sure it's the most important thing ever to have happened:

That's right. In an effort to raise money, Rick Santorum named his 72-hour fund-gathering plan "Conservatives Unite Moneybomb," or "CUM," for short. You guys are right in thinking that this is pretty hilarious, but the fact that (as of this posting) he's already raised over twice what he set out to get, I'm kind of concerned.

19 comments:

  1. I'm moving from the Bay Area to Alexandria, and I switched my Groupon location accordingly. This is a conversation about that with my friend, let's call him Eric:

    (3:26:39 PM) Evren: signed up for Groupon in Alexandria
    (3:26:48 PM) Evren: deal on Korean BBQ FTW
    (3:28:09 PM) Eric : nice
    (3:28:24 PM) Evren: but of course
    (3:28:27 PM) Evren: it's Korean bbq
    (3:28:29 PM) Evren: AND SUSHI
    (3:28:37 PM) Evren: JUST BECAUSE THEY KINDA LOOK SIMILAR
    (3:28:41 PM) Evren: DOESN'T MAKE THE CUISINE THE SAME
    (3:30:40 PM) Eric: ...
    (3:30:51 PM) Eric: you will get to meet real white people
    (3:31:02 PM) Eric: egg noodles and ketchup
    (3:31:03 PM) Evren: yeah dude
    (3:31:11 PM) Eric: cucumber and mayo
    (3:31:11 PM) Evren: mayonnaise sandwiches
    (3:31:17 PM) Eric: white people
    (3:31:26 PM) Evren: let's just say mayo and [------]
    (3:31:30 PM) Eric: yeah
    (3:31:37 PM) Evren: it's not a condiment
    (3:31:39 PM) Evren: it's an ingredient
    (3:31:46 PM) Evren: and possibly a sexual lubricant
    (3:32:17 PM) Eric: ...
    (3:32:42 PM) Eric: "Is that cum or mayo?"
    (3:32:47 PM) Evren: "BOTH"
    (3:32:48 PM) Eric: you don't want to hear that question
    (3:33:02 PM) Evren: that's the Gingrich
    (3:35:39 PM) Evren: the frothy mixture of semen and mayonnaise that is sometimes the result of old redneck sex.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Outrageously funny... Looking forward to what jon stewart does with it

    ReplyDelete
  3. Maybe it's a subliminal message to cum when seeing santorum ?

    ReplyDelete
  4. Seriously, there's gotta be a mole in the Santorum campaign, Right? Right?

    ReplyDelete
  5. It has to be the most important thing that's happened. I was hoping Dan had formed the PAC. Can't wait for Rachel, Jon and Colbert to get hold of this. Re the donations, maybe we can use this to point out what a frothy mix he is.

    ReplyDelete
  6. But it's clearly not correct, because by definition santorum doesn't necessarily include that. A better name would have been Let's Unlock a Better Empire AND Fund Evil Creepy Evangelical Sod. Or just L.U.B.E. AND F.E.C.E.S. for short.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I would not be too worried. Any money given to him is being wasted. He's a windbag, always was, always will be.

    ReplyDelete
  8. The CUM just adds to Santorum's "frothiness!"

    ReplyDelete
  9. You should look here to know how to write the best resume!

    ReplyDelete
  10. It is one of the best site that I have visited. Hope you will share more quality blog posts thank you.
    Take instant support from Quickbooks Support to solve any query or problem that you are facing with your accounting software. Explore more on Quickbooks online support

    ReplyDelete
  11. Avail the specialized support to keep your devices well in shape at Staples Tech Support. Connect with experts at Staples Tech Support to keep your devices up and running.

    ReplyDelete
  12. QuickBooks Customer Service Number is available round the clock to resolve accounting problems. Reach experts at QuickBooks Customer Service Number and get instant help.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Are you searching for the most reliable Already Written Essays? All the Custom Dissertation Writing should be original based on in-depth research and include appropriate citations based on current references on the Pre Written Essays.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Perkenalkan Situs Terbaik.
    Mencari situs Poker aman dan terpercaya.?
    Sudah Berdiri sejak Lama Dan Menberikan kemenangan dan keuntungan besar buat member nya.
    Tunggu apa lagi Segera Join DI
    Hoyapoker
    RoyalFlush88
    ditunggu ya agan"

    ReplyDelete
  15. I like your content very much. I wanted this only. I have seen it many times, I used to get the answer on your website. Well! let me tell you. I work at Mokulele Airlines. If you ever want to book tickets in future, Contact us.

    ReplyDelete
  16. You can book your tickets any hour of the day or night as our executives work 24/7-365 days to assist you. Our experts trained to work efficiently and able to book your tickets with Air Canada Phone Number Toll free.

    ReplyDelete