Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Santorum Mailbag

The messages you guys are sending in seem to be getting more creative. Check it:
A result of the Iowa caucuses and too much coffee:

The Senate Republican quorum
Mistakenly broke with decorum
When they went out en masse
And got fucked up the ass
'Cause they wanted to vote with Santorum.

JJ
That's nice I like that.


Hey there,

I run a student newspaper on Vanderbilt's campus and we've recently decided to endorse Rick Santorum and his run for the president. My newspaper has a large LGBTQI readership so we decided to endorse Rick because he is the closest thing this campaign has to an openly gay candidate.

Thought you and your readers might enjoy the article.

Peace and laughter,

Dan King
Wait- there's an 'I' in 'LGBTQ' now? What does the 'I' stand for?


Santorum's vest on his site is getting more hits, so time to Google!

Plus have you seen this?

Oh that's fun. I'm wearing my sweater vest, and y'all should too.

I have a suggestion for a verb for Rick to go with Santorum...

Rick: (verb) to gargle jubilantly.
Ew.


Spotted this in a NYT article:

"“I’m debating between Gingrich, Santorum and Perry,” said Ross Little Jr., a committee member from Louisiana, referring to Rick Santorum, a former senator from Pennsylvania."

Is this the first time the NYT has clarified the referent of 'Santorum'?
Shout-out!


Dear Fellow Conservative,

My campaign's incredibly strong second-place finish in New Hampshire has the national media stunned.

. . . .

You and I don't have to "wait for the next election."

My campaign is making history right now with the support of Patriots like you who are finished with being told by the liberal media and the Republican establishment to sit on the sidelines year after year.

My incredible top-tier finish in Iowa and my tremendous second-place showing in Tuesday's New Hampshire primary demonstrate that I am the conservative alternative that can take on and defeat both Mitt Romney and Barack Obama this year.

But I need your help to continue getting my constitutional conservative message out in South Carolina, Florida, Nevada, and beyond.

Please, donate $100, $50, $25, $10, or whatever you can contribute right away to help me WIN the Republican nomination and give the American people a CLEAR alternative to Barack Obama's disastrous Big Government, big spending administration.

For Liberty,

Ron Paul
Who put this email address on Ron Paul's mailing list? I hate it when people call me their "fellow conservative."


Get some help bud. You obviously are a sick gay man. I'm sure Obama offers some kind of welfare for sick low-life bigots like you.
Alas, the low-life bigot tax credit was the first to go.

7 comments:

  1. I believe the 'I' in LGBTQI stands for intersex. Rick has already been redefined as:

    Rick (v): To orally remove santorum
    reference: http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=9539475

    ReplyDelete
  2. LGBTQI Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer, Questioning and Intersex

    That just has to be the correct transliteration, because I found it on the Internet. Next I'm gonna look up Intersex. ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Creative is good! ;) So, are there any other artists out there creating their own unique images of what they think santorum looks like?

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  4. Ah. I thought it might be intersex. Does that mean we've got everything covered now? Because there's only so many letters I can memorize.

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  5. I just learned what the T was a couple years ago. I am not even up to speed on the Q yet. Can anyone get my political correctness up to date?

    I am also not sure what Intersex is. Any help here too?

    Thanks.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Here is some reading for you:
      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Queer
      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Intersex
      http://isna.org/

      Delete
  6. Actually, that's still missing a letter. There's also the "A" for asexual. I first encountered the term in high school around *mumble* *mumble* years ago. There was a girl that hung out with us queer and gay kids. At first we just assumed that she was an in-the-closet queer or lesbian who just needed some time to become comfortable with who she was.

    After a few years, it became clear that she was what she said she was--an asexual woman. She was always with us, because the hetero kids wouldn't accept her and she felt closer to those of us who were outside of that hetero box. Now, *mumble* *mumble* years have passed since we graduated and she's still identifying as asexual.

    My life partner is asexual. I'm queer. We're raising my queer child from a former relationship. We've been together for over a decade and plan to grow old together. Some folks might not understand that, but it works out wonderfully for us and that's all that matters.

    I'm hopeful that more people will start to acknowledge this variation of human sexual expression and orientation. It is just as legitimate as my queer identity. It is marginalizing in the same way that being LGBTQI is and should be viewed as a part of our community. I remember when people thought of bisexuals as "gay people in denial". I remember when the term "queer" began to be reclaimed by those who felt that the term "bisexual" didn't quite describe who they were. Our "T" sisters and brothers still fight for inclusion and face discrimination in our community, even though cisgender hetero-dominated societies almost invariably associate being transgender with being lesbian or gay. The same is true for people who are intersex.

    I think that our community has benefited from and been strengthened by the inclusion of those with these identities. Embracing those who are asexual can only make us more powerful. Besides, is it really all that hard to add another letter to show solidarity with everyone who is forced to fight heteronormativity?

    ReplyDelete